Friday, 29 January 2016

Who Are Real Parents?

Reading this title, for few moments you might be surprised and will start wondering what the article is all about? Obviously; real parents are our mom and dad or those who have given us birth. So, what’s new in that?

Yes, this is the thought most of my lovely readers will have and it is viable because we all have never gone in the depth to know what exactly “Parent” means? We just know who gives birth are our parents. That’s it sweet and simple.

But, have we ever wondered why we remember our parents? Why we call them as parents? The answer to this question is as follows:

Who are called “Parents”?
In Indian mythology, Lord Krishna is worshipped the most. Now, if I ask who is the mother of Lord Krishna? 90% of you will answer “Yashodha”. Why? Yashodha didn’t give birth to him. Still, we remember her as Krishna’s mother.

The reason: It is mother Yashodha who brought up Lord Krishna, took care of him as her own son  and supported him in every way physically, socially, financially and at all stages of life; be it good or bad. She took care of our beloved lord like as her own son. Hence, she is known as Krishna’s mother.
Lord Krishna’s biological mother was Devaki but she is not known or remembered much even though Krishna was in her womb for nine months!  Why? Actually we must remember her as his mother instead of Yashodha!

Another similar incident I want to share with is of “The Apple Founder; Steve Jobs”. Like our Lord, Steve Jobs had four parents; two mothers and two fathers; one who gave him birth and one who adopted him.
  • Paul and Clara Jobs (adoptive parents)
  •  Joanne Schieble Simpson and Abdulfattah Jandali (biological parents)

According to Steve Jobs; Paul and Clara Jobs are his real parents because they are the ones who themselves faced many difficulties while upbringing him while his biological parents are the just the sperm and ovum bank.

Now, from these two examples; I want to show only one thing that “Real Parents are those who actually are with us in good and odd times, who support us and who encourage us, motivate us, who frame us into good citizen apart from just having a biological relationship”.

Even if you look at the definition of Parenting; you will realize what actually the meaning of Parents is. Let’s know from where did the word “Parent” arrive? What is its definition? What does it actually mean?

How did the term ‘Parent’ come into existence?         
This word that we speak several times has arrived from Old French parent which used to mean” father” till early 15th century. It is arrived from the Latin term “Parentem” which means father or, mother, ancestor and in late 15th century; it was used as a synonym for “Elder”.

According to Wikipedia, Parenting is the technique used to promote and support the child physically, emotionally, socially as well as financially. It refers to the upbringing up of child rather than just having biological relationship. “

Back to the topic:

Hence, if I compare this above mentioned definition with the examples that I have given here; I can say that we only remember our Parents because they have done many things for us. They have supported us from childhood till adulthood.

They have taken care of us in good and bad times. They have encouraged us, pushed us, shown us the right way in our lives and hence we are able to succeed. We don’t remember them because they gave birth to us; we remember them because they gave us gifts, paid our school fees, bought us good clothes, took us to various places and have enjoyed with us, cried with us.

So, think friends how selfish we are! The day we stop getting things from them or they fail to fulfill our demands; we don’t hesitate to bad mouth them, we don’t hesitate to say them that they don’t know anything about the world!
We don’t even think when we speak in front of them.  Even when they need our help; we are unwilling to help them.

It’s time to think that if we behave in the same manner then the days are very near when even If we will shower  tons of cash on our children, fulfill their all demands; they won’t respect us  because at present we are not doing so!.

Disclaimer:  There’s no intention here to hurt anyone’s emotions or make anyone feel bad. These are just my views. There’s no pin pointing to any one and no relevance to anyone’s life. If there’s any then it is just a coincidence.

My Advice:  Respect your “those parents” who have done so much for you whosoever it may be your father, mother, sibling, guardian anyone.  Help them when they are in need. Always be thankful to them because it is due to them you are able to shine out in this world.
And the most important (For those who are parents to be); try to be a good parent. If you cannot fulfill your own needs; please don’t think of bringing anyone in this world whose wishes you cannot fulfill.

Live your life to the fullest and then think of rearing someone. Keep this thing in mind; it’s a hard fact to digest; YOU WILL BE ONLY REMEMBERED BY YOUR CHILDREN IF YOU HAVE SOME AMOUNT OF CONTRIBUTION IN THEIR LIVES; JUST BIOLOGICAL RELATIONSHIPS DON’T MAKE YOU “PARENTS”.

Friday, 1 January 2016

The Gift of Giving

What comes to your mind when you read this title? Is it Money? Is it Time? Or is it something else? Well, there are thousands of tangible and intangible things that we can give.
Forget things, there are even moments of joy, happiness that we can give. 

The only thing is we must get the feeling that we must give and that too without expecting anything. In this World where people believe in give and take relationships only! I find very rare people like me who love to give without any expectation of getting something in return. Yes, I do so.

I love to give because I believe that what I will give I will get back two folds no matter if that is not from the same person. Today, on the first day of this New Year; I would like to share my experiences of giving:

The Gift of Giving:

a) Gift of Giving an Idea: An experience I had in 2014 - It was 9 am in the morning. I was doing my household chores as usual. Suddenly one lady came and said” Please can you purchase one plastic bucket from me”. I have started this new business today

I said Yes I will but in exchange of that you have to take my old plastic bucket. For few minutes; she was silent and then she asked how much money you will give me along with your old bucket.

As the plastic was really of good quality, I offered INR 50 + old bucket. She agreed. I purchased. Later after few minutes, she came to me and returned to me my old bucket.

I was surprised but later I found that using my idea of exchange; she had sold all her buckets and other plastic utensils and also earned some money because from all other people she asked for both money as well as old plastic buckets. She was so happy that I could see her thankful face.

This made my day. She was unknown to that idea and using that she was able to do some good business on the first day itself.

My gift was her happy face against my small idea.”

b) Gift of Giving a Polythene Bag: An experience I had in 2015- We are regular customers of NationalHandloom Corporation. As a result, there are plenty of large polythene bags available with us.

One fine day in morning; a potato vendor saw that polythene bag and he asked” Can you give me some of these bags as these will be useful for me to keep potato wafers.

It was April; the season of yummy potato wafers and along with potatoes he used to sell wafers as well. I said “Yes I will give”.

Next day, I gave him two huge polythene bags and he was like “Thank you so much child. God will not give you a single disease even in your nail!” I was so happy to listen this that my joy knew no bounds.

On that I was thinking: Does polythene bag matters this much to this vendor that he gifted me such a big thing?

“My gift was a blessing to remain healthy forever against giving the polythene bag”.

 c) Gift of Giving someone wishes for New Year:  An experience I had on the first day of 2016 :
1st January, the first day of New Year; we wish everyone; bless everyone with success, bliss, peace and prosperity. There are even people who get thousands of wishes from everyone and then there are people who get none!

Yeah! It’s true; not everyone gets wishes for New Year. Yes, people like you and me get lots of New Year wishes from near and dear ones, from relatives, friends, well wishers and lots and lots of people.

We wish everyone but we damn care to wish those who are a part of our daily lives. There are people because of whom our lives have become so easy that if they are excluded then you or I won’t be able to sit at ease and do our work.

I guess by now you might have got the idea about whom am I talking? Did you? What you said? Parents! No. Siblings! No. Relatives! No. Friends! No. Neighbours! No. Teachers! No. Mentors! No. Prime Minister! No. President! No. Spouse! No. Then who!

Yes, these are important and of course contribute a lot but still there are some without whom it’s impossible to survive. Ok, I am ending the suspense here. These are people such as Milkman, Newspaper vendor, Grocery store owners, Vegetable Vendors, Farmers, Postman and the list is endless.

Think if your milkman doesn’t arrive on time; will you be able to go to office on time? Yes you can but without tea! And you will shout “Today that…. Not came and my day wasted!

If your vegetable vendor doesn’t supply you fresh vegetables every day, will you be able to eat good food! Yes, you will buy from restaurants but again it’s for one or two days. So, a vegetable vendor has an important role in making your day fabulous and healthy.

Likewise, most of us are addicted to have newspaper with a cup of tea. Yes, I know everybody has an app now in the mobile phone but still a Newspaper is what anyone cannot get rid of.

Think if your newspaper vendor stops coming! Oh my! How will I spend my morning time? It is taking too long to get the tea finished! These will be your comments.

In return of their services, what you give them? A bonus of Rs.50 on Diwali and that too saying there’s lot of inflation we cannot afford! Have you ever wished them? Have you ever given them anything?

Try it out. Just when you go to your grocery shop, say that shop owner “Happy New Year” with a smile. You will be amazed to see how happy that person is! How much respect he gives you!

The reason; we just buy things and move on; never greet them. But this New Year, try this out and see their happiness. I am sure your heart will flower like anything; the happiness that you will get cannot be compared to anything else.

As a return gift, say “Happy New Year” to them and experience the real joy, the real gift of giving. I did this and what I got is unexplainable.

“My gift was a huge smile on his face with special respect against wishing him Happy New Year.”

Well, these in last two years I had lots of experience of giving things to people in any form.  Talking about 2016, this was my first experience and I am sure in my whole year; this will be the most wonderful one.

Title Explanation: Generally, we find articles like “Joy of Giving” but I wrote “Gift of Giving” Reason:  Every time in return of something; I got a smiling face, a happy face, blessings and special respect.

So my best buddies; try to follow a habit of giving something to someone in any way and you will see how beautiful your life becomes. It’s not necessary to go and search for slum kids or poor people.

If you feel like giving; start giving. Show your willingness; the god inside you will guide you!